Thunder Only Happens When It's Raining

Trouble seems to follow me in spades. Whoever stole my iPod, apparently also slashed some important tubing in my vehicle, because my car’s motor sputtered and died on me only a few days after. (I can’t actually prove this, but he/she’s already a bastard which makes them my #1 scapegoat.)

So after a paltry two years, the free car my bio-dad got me is dead. I’m not really complaining, it just came at an inconvenient time. I got scared that I might have to huff it or loser cruiser it up for a while. Or so I thought. Turns out the parentals decided to buy a new car and when found out their old one was worth squat thanks to the “Cash for Clunkers” program destroying trade-in value, they loaned the grand cherokee to me until I get a new (used) car. It's nice to be in a bigger vehicle again though. I was sick of getting intimidated by big burly brosefs in their lifted trucks and their hardcore stickers.I mean how is a champagne saturn supposed to compete with that? Anyone have any suggestions on what to get?

I will mention a funny shout out about dealerships, it’s disgustingly scary when you discover them ripping you off. When my mom went in to buy a vehicle she had already extensively researched it. The salesman tried to mark it up by 6,500 dollars! My mom was so furious, she demanded to start over with a new sales person. I’m not sure what the mark up really was, but I can tell you that first guy was out a sale. I guess the lesson learned here is that as a buyer the power really is in your hands. I hope everyone remembers that when it’s their turn.

I will tell you this though, in the brief 24-hour hiatus I was vehicle-less, I noticed some rather infuriating things. What is with people parking in two spaces? I’m not talking about those douche bags who intentionally park in two spots to protect their pretty BMW. Honestly, to me that ideology seems like reverse psychology. I always imagine someone brave enough to drag their keys, belt buckle, hell finger nails across a shiny coat of primer as retaliation for being inconvenienced so said douche bag’s car wouldn’t get dented their while they ran in to get their mocha choca latte.

No those people play with fire and leave their fate in other people’s hands.
I’m talking about the people who pull into a spot where they just didn’t quite make it. I mean what the hell? When you get out of your car, there are two painfully obvious white stripes to let you know just exactly how intelligent you are. Yet these people still pull in and park, get out and carry on with their business as usual. It begs the question that did people not realize if a baby stroller between them and the adjacent car that maybe they might have screwed up?

I mean it doesn’t take rocket science to place a rectangle inside a larger rectangle does it?

Personally, I’d like to see police officers be enabled to ticket people on account of “dumbassery” or an inconvenience fee (think Ticketmaster). If someone get’s caught screwing other people over they too should get screwed. Rather than raise taxes and continue to plague good-minded people, let’s punish the idiots like they did back in the good old dark ages.

I’m off to go check out auto loans….

GO SEE DISTRICT 9 IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY!